Guyanese Signs of the Zodiac

Guyanese Signs of the Zodiac
November 27, 2014 at 3:57am
Guyanese Signs of the Zodiac

Every day we wake up to signs of the “Guyanese Apocalypse” we at Guysnooze are suffering from overexposure to allegations and innuendo, instead of asking the usual “wha daag Guyana kick” we decided to investigate what mysterious power makes us tick.

The Chinese Zodiac is well know, what is not so well known is the Guyanese Counterpart signs, we at Guysnooze caught up with Guyanese archeologist ….or is astrophysicist…ahmmmm…. Star Gazer for an overdue education.

GSZ: Star bai, can you explain this Astromatic Science ting to we?

SG: Eveyting is Eveyting, Ying got Yang, Ping got Pong and Kaieteur got Nandlall pun tape 2, ha ha, so everything in universe have an equivalent, so it is with Zodiac signs, very significant as it explains human behaviour and can predict many things, I have prepared an equivalent chart for you, with little notes to help your shallow intellect grasp this deep science.

Aries = Biting Goat

Taurus = Bullshit Artists (see PR Dept for clarification)

Gemini = Boy/Girl at the Cathedral (see Thin Slice)

Cancer = Crab in a barrel (you knows yourself)

Leo = Sheep in Lions Clothing (see Protestors)

Virgo = Virgin Dangles (You go girl!)

Libra = Chang

Scorpio = Frenemy (see Backstabbers, FB frens, Freddie & Mark etc.)

Sagittarius = Jackass Cart Driver (see Mini-bus driver)

Capricorn = Old Ramgoat at Palmscourt (see Old Dude in White Shoes)

Aquarius = Koker Attendant (see Pump man)

Pieces= Odder Fish in the Sea

GSZ: Thanks Star Man, I hope the editor lets us publish this….. (Phones wife) …babes, throw way dem white shoes ah used to wear to Palmscourt, ah gun explain later….

*A Protest Now Underway to protest our calling protestors sheeps…. I’s a baaa..kanalist!