Wong Jet

Wong  Jet

Well what a strange day! …it all began wid a call to our news desk… 

GZ: ‘ello, Guysnooze, no news too small  for us or too big for dat matter!

Caller: uhm, I need you to some spin for me, like PR work…

GZ: yeah, yeah, wat yuh gat in mind fuh pay fuh dis service?

Caller: money is no object, what I need is to be your client and uhm confidentiality , you unnerstan?

GZ: yeah, yeah, confidential an’ ting is we middle name.

Caller: well, is like dis, I get skin-up on a lil trip I tek wid some chinee frens, in a private jet , yuh know…dem bannas from shin by lin, and mih boss vex, he expecting ah explanation tomorrow or soon…yuh know, when ah tink about it, ah shoulda know GT people ent got luck wid jet… cash jet man get frig up only the odder day….

GZ: say no more sir, we can do a list of plausible explanations and send for you, once you make a choice, we will start the PR machine and begin the spin cycle!

Caller: Thank you, ahm, Bee will drop your fee by the by…

GZ Editor: “lads, we have a live fish on the hook here, somebody mix we up wid the banna pon the dam, we ent fuh sale , but leh we play the game and see where it goes… let we have a meeting to come up wid a list of possible explanations fuh dis plane trip”

Dear Minister.

Please see attached our Top Ten Explanations for your actions, let us know how you want to skin this cat.

10. We get in Wong Jet.Big mixup...thank god no pictures of Yong Ting tun up,

9. Dis picture was taken at Ogle in BK new plane.

8. All I remember is somebody suggested we go for Chinese dinner, I said yes, and 38 hours later, I eating dog, cat and rat in one fry rice.

7. It is a fotochop by the banna dem fire at karnicle, he getting back at me!

6. China? Why? Because some chinee people in the plane?.... So it had black people…you sure is not Africa, or the fat chick deh…could be India? ..ya’ll racist!

5. It is Another Fotochop Conspiracy to get rid of me! #nameekaram

4. All the other planes in China was full, holiday weekend. Jackie Chan birthday skites!

3. Is dem bitches at NISIL fault, let’s go collect the money they said…

2. I got Roladex watches and odder gifts for all member of the dear press corps, it was cheaper to hire a jet than pay the overweight on KAL, but since is ‘scandal’ I guess ya’ll ent want nuttin… or do you?

1. Is not Shin By Lin, all Chinese look alike to you racist skunts!

*life pon dis dam not for sale.